drivel drivel drivel

I don't have anything too interesting on my mind at the moment, but I'm just content with this day, this moment, this stage in my life. And that is rare.

I really enjoyed opening this morning. Despite the death fog on my way to work (Left at 4:20 to be safe, mind you) and the early morning stress due to lots of new stuff @ work, I had a good time. I really love our new soy. The Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate is FABULOUS. Pumpkin cream cheese muffins & scones means FALL. I escaped some goss. (hallelujah) and the mindlessness of Mr. S (double hallelujah). I just left work happy & at peace. I even open tomorrow & I'm excited about it. This is weird. Just last night I was throwing a fit because I had to get up at 3:40. I came home & took Daisy for a walk and it SMELLED like FALL. Anyway, I'm hanging out with my husband as he works and my dog as she naps and licks her feet... will eventually venture out to Avon (this is always exciting for someone who is less than wealthy... by America standards) with my man, do some grocery shopping. I started to re-watch Lost & am going to finish it so I can watch it once it's back on TV. I don't know... this is drivel & I know it but it's happy drivel & I like where happy drivel comes from...

the great philospher, Ben Gibbard.

I wish we could open our eyes
To see in all directions at the same time
Oh what a beautiful view
If you were never aware of what was around you
And it is true what you said
That I live like a hermit in my own head
But when the sun shines again
I'll pull the curtains and blinds to let the light in.

Sorrow drips into your heart
through a pinhole
Just like a faucet that leaks
and there is comfort in the sound
But while you debate half empty or half full
It slowly rises
your love is gonna drown

Ode to my Best Friend.

Until October the 6th, my husband & I will be dog-sitting the lovely Daisy. It's been a fun adventure & as I watch Tim fall in love with my dog, I hope I'll one day convince him we need a little mutt for ourselves =)


And, I have saved the best for last.

the heart.

"At the heart of Christianity is a God who died for his enemies, praying for their forgiveness."


This came from Tim's sermon this morning & is either loosely quoting Tim Keller's book, The Reason for God or quoting it exactly.

LL

Lindsay Lohan called Sarah Palin "media obsessed" in her myspace "celebrity blog" the other day.

I find this quite hilarious.

I don't think that Lindsay Lohan has the right to call anyone but herself "media obsessed."

Thanks and have a lovely day!!  =)

broken.

So apparently, I really like blogging!  I think it's because this blog serves more like a journal... something I can look back on & watch how I have grown & where life has changed.  Now that is exciting.   So what I'm about to say next, I hope does not sound bad....

I've been doing some thinking lately.  Honestly, I've been sort of searching for and trying to develop relationships that just fit.  That may not make sense to you, but I come packaged with all sorts of weird social issues.  I love people, don't get me wrong.... 

I am rarely just comfortable in the moment.  I do feel rather at ease with my husband.  That is a bond I never understood until the day that I got married.  There is something very special that develops.  Two bodies, hearts, and minds come together to become one.  'Nuff said.  When I'm with my kids at Oasis, I feel relaxed and at ease.  I feel they are part of my purpose at this point in my life.  Maybe that is the reason for the ease.  Then I have many constants in my life.  My family, Tiffany, the Illgs, my in-laws, Heather, etc.... Who I love & have blessed me with so much love, grace, and joy..... but because I am an overanalyzer, at times I feel strange... but that's just me being awkward =)  No big deal.  

There are two places in which I've recently felt really lost: at work and at church.   At work, I'm the new kid so I guess it's understandable.  At church,  I'm the only one my age and at my specific stage in life.  So I guess I have a hard time relating.... and I'm so hypersensitive that I feel most of the time that people (including many of the constants in my life) don't want to be around me or find me that interesting.  And that is okay, I guess.  I have tried to tell myself that it really doesn't matter.  I don't have to be anything special to anyone else because God is working in my life & loves me like nobody else could.  

So I am reading through Searching for God Knows What by Donald Miller.  (I love him.)  He sort of worked through an idea using the story of the Fall & Adam & Eve being naked.  I'll try to quote some parts of what he wrote.  

"The idea of clothes had never crossed their minds.  And I know you think I am being immature by bringing this up, but the thing is, Moses repeated this idea five times....... If you ask me, the most obvious thing that happened after the Fall was that people started wearing all kinds of clothes.......Here is what I think Moses was saying: Man is wired so he gets his glory (this security, his understanding of value, his feeling of purpose, his feeling of rightness with his maker, his security for eternity) from God, and this relationship is so strong, and God's love is so pure, that Adam and Eve felt no insecurity at all, so much so that they walked around naked and didn't even realize they were naked.  But when that relationship was broken, they knew it instantly.

If man was wired so that something outside himself told him who he was, and if God's presence was giving him a feeling of fulfillment, then when that relationship was broken, man would be pining for other people to tell him that he was good, right, okay with the world, and eternally secure.  As I wrote earlier, we all compare ourselves to others, and none of our emotions- like jealousy and envy and lust- could exist unless man was wired so that somebody else told him who he was, and that somebody else was gone."

Hello.  

2010.

So I found out that Shaq will be retiring in 2010 today.

I'm so glad that he decided to bring his lazy buffoon butt to Phoenix on the tail end of Steve Nash's career in Phoenix.

After Stevie leaves, I'm done w/the NBA.

BOO.

what a bum.

Love.

First of all, props to my girl Hannah from work who found me a lovely pair of CAMMO FLATS today at Walmart!!!!  Whooop I love them... and I love her... she is fun.

I am currently sitting at a Starbucks on 86th Street.  Tim & I just ordered some hot drinks, which was pretty exciting considering it was super beautiful & cool all day.  It really makes me excited for fall, chai lattes, sweaters, tea, and the Holidays.  =)

I also was able to find Burundi Kayanza at this store... our store gobbled it all up with our markouts almost immediately after it arrived at our store.  I can't even begin to describe to you how incredible it is!!  "Juicy and citrusy with unique herbal blackberry notes and brisk tea-like flavors, this is a brew unlike any African coffee we've offered before."  I may be a walking promotion, but I really am so thankful for all of the free stuff I get at Starbucks!  

Today was pretty non-productive.  I tried, though, I really did.  I managed to get some dishes done in between soap operas... not to mention clean the kitchen sink.  (I may have to fast from soap operas if I can't stop being lame & ridiculous.)  Anyway, now Tim & I are relaxing enjoying my night off together.  After this, we'll go get a cheeseburger from somewhere & do some grocery shopping.  I love being married.  It's more fun that I ever could have imagined.  So I will leave you with picture I took in Sedona, Arizona while on my honeymoon.

everybody's got their something....

The only thing that I do not like about working nights sometimes:

Soap operas are on during the day..... abc dominates and I hate this weakness that I have!  blah.  I should just turn them off.  That might help, but then I'd need music and our iPod music player thingy isn't working right now.  I think it needs a battery.  It is time for fall.... and fall is synonymous with David Bazan... so I shouldn't be listening to some girl cry because her dude (Ryan) isn't in love with her anymore... he's in love with Greenlee who is married to Aidan.  

Greenlee married Aiden even though Ryan walked in on her wedding & told her not to.  See?  Trash.

Well I am going to go make some pizza rolls & be productive.  

dannica likes her americano with room.

p.s.

i made dannica patrick an americano last friday.

she is 80 times smaller than you can imagine!

cookies.

So I shall be honest here.  For the most part, I have felt that blogs can be pretentious and reserved for the egomaniac.... and as for live journals... well those are just too invasive.  But tonight, I decided I just plain wanted to have a blog.  Why?  hmm

Maybe it's because Tiffany has one.  Or maybe it's because if your sister buys two shirts at Kohls that are really cute and you like them, you go buy them, too.  Or maybe I am pretentious.  Whatever, I am lame.  Hence, the blog title.  

So for whatever reason I have all these thoughts jumbled tonight and wanted to write them down.  Every time I try to really write things down in a journal, though, I stop because I get a hand cramp and it's just so much easier for me to type (90 wpm).  

So, for starters, Tim & I had a great weekend away...

I've been at Starbucks for a few weeks now and I think I like it.  I have decided that when I work a 9-5 (or a 7-4 in my case) I wish my weeks away and I hate that.  It was always a nasty inevitable that I could never change... and now I've been forced to.  No more case of the Mondays for me!  I also love that I am in a new place that matches the new phase of my life.  I feel that God wants to use me here.  I don't know when and for what.... but, I mean, He's always using us.... and when you obsess over planning a wedding and have a lot of home crap to deal with, sometimes it is easy to push His direction aside.  I hope that I can focus on His voice for awhile.  Something I've never been good at.

tonight, though.... He did tell me that He is good... there is a lot of bad & pain & stuff in this world that makes me want to just get the heck out of dodge sometimes.... but when I got worked up about this (like I sometimes do.... asking "Why?" all the time) He swooped in & told me that I could rest in the fact that He is good.

anyway!  So my job... yes I like it.  i have to make coffee for some mean people sometimes, though... but that's ok because this will better help me be a servant.  The servant's heart is something I do not have most of the time.... and if I want to keep my job & not be miserable & make myself crazy, I will have to remind myself that I am there to SERVE.  And drink free coffee.  

now that's not so bad =)

Tim had a bunch of people over tonight for the Colts game.  I told him I wanted him to clean the sink and the toilet in case any girls came over.  He assured me no girls would come over.

Girls came over.  =x  o married life.  

But I have to laugh at how ridiculous I am about having a clean house now.  And I am also amused that in my kitchen right now sits four different types of cookies:

chocolate chip bar cookies.

peanut butter cookies.

rainbow cookies.

soft n chewy cookies.

the only ones not organized by my Love were the peanut butter.  So I am leaving them out over night hoping that they will be stale in the morning so I don't have to look at and think about cookies all week.

Well I think that I should go to bed now.  I'm going to sleep in tomorrow since I don't work until night and this day was a bit much for me.

Much love & cheers to blogging!